


Aida

by fukujoshi (charmed7293)



Series: Timeline [2]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alpha Victor Nikiforov, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Mob, Hacking, M/M, Omega Katsuki Yuuri, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slightly Aged-Up Phichit, Torture, Victor is mentioned a lot but he doesn't actually appear in person, lol sorry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-19
Updated: 2018-07-19
Packaged: 2019-06-13 05:05:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15356895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charmed7293/pseuds/fukujoshi
Summary: After Yuuri leaves Russia, he's expecting to only spend a short time apart from Victor before they will be reunited again. He can't wait to have a proper heat-partner and even wants to bring up bonding! However, news soon reaches them that the entire NIkiforov family has been slaughtered in their home. Yuuri is beyond distraught, but soon discovers there's more going on than he initially realized--and he'll have to pull more than his own weight to get through it.





	Aida

**Author's Note:**

> This is Yuuri POV, but not of the events of Do i Posle. This is what happens immediately following them, in the years between Victor being missing and them being reunited. I had a lot of plot bunny ideas I wanted to write for this over a before/after style in Yuuri's POV, but that's coming soon! Check the end notes for more details!
> 
> Thank you to [Nora](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stammi_vicinora/works) for the beta!

Right after takeoff, Yuuri simply allows himself to bask in the rare glow of success. His mission was to establish their alliance with the Nikiforovs. He accomplished that—and then some.

It wasn’t part of the initial plan, but how could Yuuri be expected to resist someone like Victor? Of course Yuuri thought he was attractive when he first saw the pictures, but even that couldn’t compare to meeting him in-person. Victor carried himself so confidently, yet he still had respect for others, especially for Yuuri. Everything about him is so nice: his scent, his hair, his _smile_ …

Yuuri _really_ likes Victor, okay. Just this morning when they were in bed together, fucking one last time before he had to leave, Yuuri was sure Victor reciprocated. He could practically _feel_ it, even though they weren’t bonded. But now…

As the plane flies farther and farther away from Russia, he only has his thoughts to keep him company and they have never been kind to him. He’s not as assured as he was at takeoff and his mood plummets rapidly.

They’re mafia; it can be said that everything they do is based on deception. Victor could have faked everything: all the times they had sex, all the things he whispered into Yuuri’s ear. Yuuri wants so desperately for it to be real, but his anxiety is getting the better of him. It has gained a foothold in his mind and now he can’t help but think that Victor did all that so Yuuri would be more easily suggestible. What if some terms of their allegiance were skewed in the Nikiforovs’ favor and Yuuri just let it happen because he was so blinded by passion?

His dad warned him about this exact thing, too. Yuuri laughed when his dad cautioned him about seduction tactics. Who would want to seduce _him_? No one will subject themselves to that, even if it’s for personal gain.

…but what if Victor had?

There really isn’t anything all that special about Yuuri. Sure, he can handle a gun, but so can everyone else and Victor even demonstrated how his accuracy is better than Yuuri’s. Mari bests him in kenjutsu and Minako can still kick his ass in any kind of jujutsu. Yuuri has no extraordinary talent of his own. Even Phichit, who is almost two whole years younger, knows far more about computers and technology than Yuuri could ever hope to.

Feeling restless, he stands and paces over to his travel bag. He needs to get out of this suit. It was tailored to fit him exactly, yet it feels too tight and constricting. Once he’s changed into sweatpants, he’ll see about getting some food. Okay, _a lot_ of food. It won’t be his mom’s, but it will be better than this empty longing and hoping.

As soon as he unzips the bag, Victor’s scent hits him like a smack to the face. It’s too potent for it to have been absorbed during Yuuri’s stay, even when he eventually moved this bag to Victor’s room. There must be something of Victor’s inside.

Yuuri feels weak in the knees as he searches, but he doesn’t have to look far. Right on  top of his clothes there’s a tie he recognizes as the one that was around Victor’s neck on the day Yuuri arrived. Yuuri brings it up to his nose and inhales deeply. It soothes his frazzled nerves in a way unlike even his mom’s katsudon.

Victor _must_ be genuine, Yuuri thinks. With the right tools, the chemical makeup of a scent can be analyzed and then be used to determine the most effective cocktail of drugs to completely incapacitate or even kill a person. Victor gave him this, trusting Yuuri not to use it against him himself or to give it away to his enemies.

On a more romantic note, scent gifts aren’t given lightly. It’s a sign of _commitment_.

Yuuri loses track of time, just standing there and holding the tie to his nose. It doesn’t matter. None of that matters now because this has reassured him that it was all _real_. Everything Victor did and said was because he wants Yuuri, plain and simple as that.

“YUURI-SAMA!”

Yuuri jumps nearly a foot into the air. In his private, sectioned-off room, it’s easy to forget that there are others traveling with him on the plane. Thankfully, Minami doesn’t sound panicked, just excited as usual. “W-what is it, Minami-kun?”

“Did you want to eat soon?”

“Yes, sure. I’ll be out in a minute.”

“Okay!”

It pains Yuuri to put the tie down, but he does to change into more comfortable clothes. As soon as his pants are pulled up, he reaches for it again.

On second thought, it’s probably not a good idea to bring it with him when he goes to eat. He’s sure most of the contingent at least suspects there’s something between him and Victor, but there’s no need to confirm anything. So, with one last inhale, Yuuri stuffs the tie back into his bag.

* * *

 

They are welcomed back to Yuutopia with a celebratory dinner. The high of finding the scent gift still hasn’t worn off, though his parents assume his good mood is only due to completing his mission and finally being back home. While he’s definitely happy about those, knowing he has Victor is worth ten times as much.

Mari is still away on business of her own, which is disappointing, but probably for the best. Her nose has always been particularly sharp and there’s no doubt she would be able to smell Victor’s scent still clinging to him in ways that a business partner’s definitely shouldn’t.

As happy as Yuuri is, being surrounded by this many people is still overwhelming. He sneaks out as soon as it’s appropriate, which is when his dad cracks open his third bottle of sake. Everyone will assume he just wants to spare himself the embarrassment of watching.

When he gets to his room, he’s glad to see his bags have already been brought up. He practically rips open his travel bag and throws his own clothes aside, hunting for the tie. As soon as he has it, he flops down on his bed with it close to his face. It’s soothing and he finally lets the exhaustion from the jetlag seep into his bones. He wants to sleep for the next three days. After such an extensive mission, there’s nothing stopping him.

He drifts until he’s somewhere between awake and asleep, where he’s not quite sure if he’s imagining Victor’s hand trailing down his side or not. A pleasant, sleepy arousal clouds his mind. It feels like Victor is pressing down on all sides of him, hands sliding over his body. Is this what spending his heat with Victor will be like? If so, Yuuri can’t wait.

He gasps at the buzzing against his thigh. A vibrator? They didn’t have the chance to use toys when they were together, too desperate for each other’s touch, but he’s certainly not opposed to the idea. Victor is teasing him, only leaving it on for a few seconds before turning it off. He’s not even moving it anywhere!

Yuuri goes to grab the toy out of Victor’s hand and do it himself, but he only touches fabric. Why is he still wearing his pants? He pushes himself up and opens his eyes. Oh, he’s alone. Victor is still back in Russia while he had to return to Japan—

_BUZZZZT_

He nearly jumps out of his skin when the vibration resumes. It’s coming from his pocket, meaning it was just his phone. There was no Victor and no toy. At least his heat is soon and Victor will be coming for that…

_BUZZZZT_

Yuuri finally fishes his phone out of his pocket. Only a handful of people have this number and only one would be calling him at this time.

“Phichit!” he greets with a smile. Sure, his friend may have woken him up from his nap, but he’s still glad to see him. There was barely any time to exchange quick texts during his mission.

“Yuuri! How was everything in Russia?” Phichit is all smiles on-screen. He’s sitting in his desk chair, the glow of his many monitors lighting his face.

“It went well.” Yuuri lets himself enthuse for a bit about the beautiful countryside that Victor showed him and how efficient the Nikiforov’s run their numerous operations. “It’s nice to be home and relax, but I had a good time.”

Phichit smiles mischievously. “Oh, did you now.”

“What’s with that look?”

“Don’t play dumb, Yuuri. You got laid.”

“What?! Why would you assume something like that?” Yuuri can feel his face heating up, no doubt  giving him away, but he has to at least make an attempt to cover it up.

“It’s absolutely not an assumption,” Phichit says sagely. “You’re _glowing_ and you haven’t been in this good of a mood since…well, the last time you got laid.”

“Shut up.”

“So how was it? Sampled some White Russian? I’ve never been a fan myself, but I know how you like your…refreshments.”

Yuuri couldn’t stop himself from rolling his eyes at Phichit’s phrasing. “Victor was amazing—”

Phichit slams a hand down on his desk. “ _Victor_?! As in Nikiforov? As in the future Pahkan? As in the one you went there to meet with?”

“Yes.” Yuuri couldn’t help the questioning lilt to his voice.

“Ooooh my god, Yuuri!” The room blurs behind Phichit as he spins around in his chair. “You’re amazing, you know that?”

“What?”

“You got a nice new alliance _and_ a good fuck and all you say is ‘what?’”

“He’s more than just a good fuck,” Yuuri protests.

“Oh?”

“Victor is… _he’s_ the amazing one. He treated me with respect and listened to what I had to say right from the beginning. Even when others dismissed me. And I even, um, I even invited him here. For…for my heat.”

“ _Oh_!” Phichit’s eyes widen, his spinning coming to a sudden halt. “You’re _serious_ about him. Yuuri be caref—”

“He’s serious about me, too,” Yuuri says, indignant. Phichit doesn’t even know Victor, so how dare he make assumptions like that!

“Are you sure about that? He’s in the same line of work. He can hide and fake things. I just don’t want you to get hurt.”

“I know, Phichit, and I’ve thought about all that, but…” Yuuri looks down and his fingers find the tie to worry it between them.

“But…?” Phichit looks at him expectantly.

Yuuri should tell him, so that he’ll understand. If he doesn’t, Phichit will always be suspicious of Victor. Yuuri wants Phichit’s full support, but he’s also trapped between keeping the tie as his own special secret and shouting from the rooftops that Victor has declared his intentions. He also has to keep in mind that discretion is of the utmost importance. A politically arranged alliance between their families was one thing, but _merging_ them through something like mating was another.

“You can’t tell _anyone_ , okay?” he starts.

“Yes, yes, of course,” Phichit says dismissively, leaning backwards in his chair.

“Phichit,” Yuuri says firmly. “You. Tell. _No one_.”

Phichit sits up straight. He knows that tone means business. “Okay. No one. Not even from beyond my grave.”

“I know Victor feels the same way because…because he gave me a scent gift.” Yuuri holds the tie up.

Phichit’s shocked expression is on the screen for a split second before everything blurs as the phone slips from Phichit’s fingers. There’s some muffled swearing in the background.

Phichit reappears, shrieking, “ _Really_?! Holy shit, Yuuri, it really is serious!”

“Yes, and that’s why you can’t leak this like you did with what happened at Mari’s birthday party. Everyone will be offended there wasn’t a formal announcement and some will feel threatened—”

“Of course! I can hold my tongue for this. But you still haven’t answered my question. How was it? Did you get yourself some alpha knot?”

Yuuri groans and buries his face in his free hand. He appreciates Phichit’s attempt to steer the conversation away from a more serious topic, but _still_.

* * *

 

The rumors reach them two days later, only whispers, but they’re from reliable sources. The Nikiforovs have been brought down. The current Pakhan, Victor’s father, was murdered in his own house. There’s nothing definitive about Victor yet, but his car and driver were found in the back of the house, both full of bullet holes.

Devastation doesn’t begin to describe what Yuuri feels. When they first received the news, he sat numbly at the breakfast table. His dad started to talk about how disappointing it was to be left with nothing after all the time they had invested into the alliance and Yuuri retreated to his room.

He couldn’t listen to that.

He knows it was always strictly political for his dad, but it became so much more for himself. Everyone Yuuri personally met was likely murdered, including the man he wanted to become his mate, and his dad just complains about how what happened was all an inconvenience.

So Yuuri holes himself up in his room, not even leaving for meals. Minami tries to get him for dinner, sending his mom up when he fails. She picks the lock, but Yuuri pretends to be asleep when she comes over to his bed. He doesn’t care that she knows he’s faking it. She’ll understand that he just wants to be left alone.

His phone has been ringing all day. It could be any number of people—Phichit, Minako, the Nishigoris—but he doesn’t make any move to answer it. Phichit is still the only one who knows about his true relationship with Victor; the others are probably calling because they’ve caught wind of his strange behavior. He doesn’t want to explain to them. He doesn’t even want to talk to Phichit and only hear empty words of condolence.

Maybe he’s being dramatic. He and Victor have only known each other for a few weeks. They weren’t even bonded, though Yuuri had planned on asking before his heat.

His heat…

He’s never looked forward to his heats with any enthusiasm. They’re just something to deal with, a nuisance more than anything, considering they’d put him out of commission for at least a week every few months. Yet he was actually looking forward to this one because he was going to be spending it with Victor. His heats are never fun, but this one is going to be _miserable_ since he was expecting to have it with a partner.

Not to mention that if his heat wasn’t coming up he could be in Russia, looking for Victor. It’ll be here far too soon for him to risk going. Going into heat while in enemy territory is the last thing he wants.

He feels so useless and helpless. He can’t do anything for Victor. He can’t do anything for himself. He can’t even do anything for his family, whom he can hear whispering outside his door.

They don’t keep whispering for long though.

“OTOUTO! If you don’t open this door I’m coming in.”

There was barely a second’s pause before his door was kicked in. Yuuri sits up slowly to see Mari striding into his room as if it’s her own.

“I’m glad you don’t have shoji doors or that wouldn’t have worked.”

“You’re back early,” is all Yuuri says.

“I came back because mom called and said you haven’t been eating.”

“I’ll come down and have dinner now—”

“It’s breakfast time and that call was two days ago.”

Two days? He grabs his phone to check, but it’s dead. He runs his hands through his hair. It feels gross. Perhaps it has been that long.

“Yeah, that’s right. No more lazing around.” Mari pulls a cigarette from her pack and lifts her lighter.

Yuuri wrinkles his nose. “Don’t smoke in my room.”

“Well,” Mari starts before pausing to inhale, “we’re going to have a talk and I’m going to smoke while we do. So if you don’t want me to smoke in your room you’ll just have to leave it.”

Yuuri sighs. He knows his sister is serious. He swings his legs over the side of the bed and heads for the doorway.

“Are you going to change?”

“No.”

Yuuri doesn’t stop or look back to see if Mari is following as he heads out to the gardens. He sits down on the wooden deck, letting his legs dangle off the side.

He can smell Mari before he can hear her. With her sensitive nose, Yuuri doesn’t understand how she can stand the constantly lingering smell of tobacco. She once tried to explain that she forced herself to get used to it because it covers up most of the other smells around her. One consistent scent is far better than being bombarded with a bunch of new ones every time she enters a room, apparently.

“Is this about the Nikiforovs?”

It’s just like Mari to get straight to the point. Yuuri doesn’t answer.

“They were just business partners. Dad told you not to get attached, didn’t he?”

Yuuri stares hard at a moss-covered rock. She’s just trying to get some kind of reaction out of him, even if it’s a negative one.

“Well, you worked very closely with the Pahkan’s son. What was his name again?” Mari blows out some smoke, almost directly into his face. “Vlad?”

“Victor,” Yuuri grit out. He wanted to remain silent, but he just can’t take the slight against Victor. Mari knows very well what his name is.

“Oh, Victor. That’s right. What was he like? He must have been something special to—”

Yuuri jumps to his feet. “He _is_ great, Mari, okay? _Is_.”

He’s not entirely sure where that came from. There’s no evidence that Victor is still alive. In fact, there’s more to the contrary. Well, Yuuri was never exactly practical. He was the yakuza kid who insisted on dance lessons over something useful like judo.

Mari just stares up at him, slowly blowing out a cloud of smoke. She sighs and looks away. “Fine, I’ll just call your hacker friend from Thailand. He can sort you out.”

At least she knows when she’s lost. Yuuri can never gracefully accept defeat. He turns and goes back inside, back up to his room to continue hiding until some good news comes along.

* * *

 

He stays in bed for another stretch of time he can’t measure. He eats a few times after both his parents come in and beg him to. He’s miserable, obviously, but he can’t tell how much of it is from the bad news and how much is from early pre-heat.

There’s footsteps in the hallways that he doesn’t recognize as either his parents or his sister. The quicker stride means this person is short, but the pattern of the footfalls indicates male…

There’s a single knock at his door and then it’s creaking open on the hinges. It hasn’t been able to close properly since Mari kicked it in.

“ _Ugh_ , Yuuri, even when I get really into something on my computer I still remember to shower.”

Yuuri opens his eyes to see Phichit standing in the doorway, a very judgemental look on his face. It quickly melts away into a fond smile.

“I have something to show you. Some good news.”

Yuuri sits up, his heart pounding. “Is it—”

“But not with you smelling like that. So either get to the baths or I’ll throw you into the koi pond!”

While Yuuri isn’t sure he really has the energy for this, he forces himself out of bed once again. If it does turn out to be something about Victor, then it will be worth it. Phichit trails after him to the baths, stripping down as Yuuri does, even when it gets him a _look_.

“I just got off a flight. Not a very long one, but I flew _coach_ so I could get here one hour earlier. All to drag your sorry ass out of bed to take a fucking shower.”

“I didn’t ask you to,” Yuuri grumbles.

Phichit hums in contemplation, tracing that one swirl of petals on Yuuri’s upper arm as he always does. “No, but you _needed_ me to and you never know how to ask for what you need.”

Refusing to acknowledge that with a response, Yuuri instead heads to the shower area. He washes thoroughly, mindful of Phichit’s eyes on him. He doesn’t want to admit it, but he does feel a bit better once they’ve dried off.

They forgo their usual clothes for jinbeis and Phichit leads Yuuri into one of their side rooms, thankfully already kept comfortable by the aircon. One of Phichit’s laptops sits open on the table, a charger and external hard drive plugged into it. Phichit sits down cross-legged and starts typing away. Yuuri opts for seiza on the pillow next to him.

“So I said I had some good news.”

Yuuri watches as Phichit flicks through the windows open on his screen. He swears he catches several files titled “Nikiforov” and his heart beats a little faster. “Yes?”

“I tried to call you after I heard about what happened to Victor’s family, but you didn’t answer. I kept trying occasionally of course, though I knew my time would be better spent looking for something that would actually make you feel better.”

Yuuri’s stomach flops. “And did you…”

Phichit smiles cautiously at him. “I wouldn’t have brought all this if I didn’t have anything for you.”

Yuuri leans forward eagerly and Phichit clicks a video file, one labeled “Victor??” The footage is grainy at best and shows a nondescript alleyway in black and white. The date in the corner places it in the morning after the attack.

“I couldn’t get into any of the cameras at the Nikiforovs’ place. Their security is too tight there, but it was a bit more lax at some of their other locations. This is one of their fronts in St. Petersburg.”

The clock keeps running, but nothing has happened yet. Yuuri is just about to ask what the point is, when there’s movement just at the edge of the screen. Someone in a baggy sweatshirt with the hood up walks into the alleyway. It’s not until they raise their gun to take aim at the camera that their face is revealed. Even through the terrible quality, Yuuri _knows_ it’s Victor. He can tell from the accurate aim alone, the screen going blank in a single shot as the camera is destroyed.

It’s really Victor! He’s alive!

“Play it again,” Yuuri demands, heart in his throat.

Phichit does, this time dragging the timer to play just as Victor walks on-screen.

“Is that him?” he asks.

“Yes, absolutely.” It’s only a blurry image, but seeing the way the figure handled the gun confirms it. Yuuri blinks away the tears in his eyes. “Where is this?”

“A place I can’t pronounce. The name is in Russian, but it seems to be a nightclub?”

Phichit pulls up the street view of a very familiar-looking building.

“That’s the club Victor took me to the first night I arrived.”

“You went to a club?” Phichit asks, astonished.

Yuuri ignores Phichit’s question and tries to remember any information Victor told him about the club. He was already thoroughly buzzed by the time they got there and doesn’t remember much beyond the first round of drinks, so that’s rather useless.

Logically, there’s either something of value there that Victor needed to get before fleeing or it was still safe and he could hide out there, at least for a little while. If he’s still there, Yuuri won’t have to waste any time with searching if he goes to Russia. He can just go straight there and retrieve Victor before his heat starts…

No! That’s a bad idea. They don’t know if Victor stayed in that location and there’s no way to even find out with the camera destroyed. His only opportunity slipped through his fingers because they were a few days late.

“Yuuri? You okay?” Phichit puts his hand on his shoulder and shakes him gently.

“Yeah, sorry.” Yuuri sighs, trying not to let the regret overwhelm him. “Just trying to think of why he would go there of all places.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to make you worry _more_.”

“No, you didn’t!” Yuuri reassures, putting his hand over Phichit’s.

This has made him feel better than he has in…he doesn’t even know how long it’s been since first hearing the news. At least several days. Now he feels _motivated._  If Victor survived that initial attack and then headed right for another place then he clearly has a plan in mind. The only way anyone could take him out is by surprise, but Victor will be ready now. They don’t stand a chance.

Once this heat is out of the way, Yuuri will head right to Russia. If Victor knows Yuuri is looking for him then he’ll let himself be found.

* * *

 

Phichit insists on staying until after Yuuri’s heat, for which Yuuri is grateful. Helping Phichit scour security footage all over St. Petersburg keeps him busy. They crash on futons in the same room as Phichit’s makeshift computer setup. There’s no time for him to creep back to his room and stew in his own self-pity.

His parents and sister are satisfied to see him enthusiastic about something again, though Yuuri suspects they would be a bit less so if they knew the details. They just think he and Phichit are messing around on the laptop, which is typical enough not to arouse suspicion. He still hasn’t told them about his relationship with Victor or even that he’s—possibly—still alive. If the Nikiforovs were still a powerful family he has no doubt they would approve, but there’s no way to judge their reaction now. It seems they’ve already moved on to looking for other potential alliances.

Yuuri allows himself to go back into him room to nest after about a week, though strangely he’s not feeling the urge as much as he usually does. He piles pillows and blankets on his bed and half-heartedly arranges them. It doesn’t look nice, but it must have satisfied his instincts since there’s no itch to continue. He drags out his pitiful collection of toys and everything is ready. His heat should hit within the next few days.

Phichit offered to help, but it would feel wrong. It’s not even that it’s Phichit; they’ve spent his heats together before. It’s just that Yuuri wants Victor. Having someone with him usually helps, but this time it will only make it worse if it’s not Victor.

They while away time watching footage and planning, but his projected start-date looms on the horizon. Eventually, Yuuri calls it quits in the middle of a session one day and retreats to his room. He shouldn’t put it off any longer.

Closing the now-fixed door behind him, he sighs at the sight of his pathetic nest. If Victor was here, Yuuri would have made the most beautiful nest, big enough for the both of them. Victor would have taken such good care of him, too, never leaving him wanting for anything.

But now he has to make-do with what he has: a pile of pillows and a box of toys.

Yuuri wraps himself in blankets and hunkers down for a miserable time. With any luck, he can sleep through the worst of it.

* * *

 

He wakes feeling completely coherent. He sits up in bed and looks around. From the darkness in the room, he can tell it’s the middle of the night. He only feels the haze of tiredness clouding his mind. There’s no lust or insatiable need to shove something inside himself.

His heat should have hit by now.

Yuuri pushes himself out of bed and glances at the box of toys. Even seeing them doesn’t stir anything or send slick rushing down his legs. So, yes, definitely not in heat. His suppressants should keep them regular, but things can get thrown off if the dosage isn’t strong enough, though that would typically result in an unexpected heat when he’s not supposed to have one, rather than preventing a scheduled one from happening.

There are very few reasons why an omega would skip a heat like this: stress, malnutrition, or biology. All things considered, he’s not too stressed by his environment, having grown up with all kinds of things happening around him. He doesn’t even remember the first time he was kidnapped because he was literally too young to form memories. Most things are par for the course. The last few weeks have been more intense perhaps, but surely not enough to stop his heat. He’s never had a problem with not eating, so it can’t be that either. Now that he’s forced himself out of his room, his meals have been regular. He had a health exam in the spring and everything checked out there. Reproductively, he was perfectly healthy so—

_Wait_.

It was at that exam that he first got the Depo shot and the doctor told him to renew it every three months, but then he got so caught up in planning for his trip to Russia and he can’t quite remember if he actually did…

Oh.

Oh _god_!

He told Victor not to worry about condoms and then _begged_ him to knot him. And he had. _So many_ times. It would be a miracle if he wasn’t—

Shit shit _shit_.

He needs Phichit.

With an impressive amount of restraint, Yuuri slips out of his room and silently hurries down the hall. He just wants to run to Phichit’s room, screaming the whole way, but that would draw some very unwanted attention. If his family found out his heat didn’t come they would jump to all sorts of conclusions and eventually they would land on the right one.

There are some guards patrolling the hallways, but Yuuri knows their routes and they’re easily avoided. He makes it to Phichit’s room without incident. Closing the door behind him, he pads over to the futon. Phichit is already pushing himself up by the time Yuuri is kneeling down beside him.

“Yuuri?” Phichit questions sleepily, before he snaps awake. “Yuuri! Is everything okay? Do you need—”

“I don’t need anything, which is kind of the problem?” Yuuri casts his gaze to the side, not wanting to look directly at Phichit.

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t…I don’t…I’m not in heat.”

Phichit leans in a bit closer and sniffs. “I’m only a beta, but you don’t smell like you’re in heat either. But even betas can smell omegas in heat. Is everything okay?”

“That depends.”

“Is it normal to skip like this?” Phichit asks.

“No, but—”

Yuuri falls backwards as Phichit leaps up, looking very panicked.

“Do we need to get you to the doctor or something? I’ll—”

“ _Phichit_!” Yuuri whispers harshly, grabbing his shirt and tugging him back down. “Be _quiet_. I don’t want to wake anyone else up. They don’t need to know about this. I just need you to do something for me.”

“Anything. What is it?”

“I need you to go to the med room. There’s a box of emergency suppressants and stuff. There should be some…some pregnancy tests in there.”

Phichit’s eyes widen to nearly twice their size. “Holy shit.”

“Please, _please_ , just go get it for me! I don’t want to risk getting caught and having my parents find out like that—”

“Of course, Yuuri! You don’t need to explain yourself. Go back up to your room, okay? We can use your bathroom.”

Yuuri just nods. They both slip out the door, heading in opposite directions down the hallway.

Yuuri looks down at the stick. There’s a tiny plus sign in the window.

“Yuuri? Yuuri?”

He looks up.

Phichit is staring at him looking very concerned. “You okay? Are those happy tears or sad tears?”

Yuuri brings a hand up to his face and feels wetness. He didn’t even realize. That explains why Phichit is slightly blurry.

“I…I don’t know,” he admits. He honestly can’t pick out a single emotion from everything clashing inside him.

Sadness is definitely there. They didn’t find any leads in all their hours spent in front of the computer screens. Yuuri has no idea what became of Victor after that short clip and there’s no way he can go to Russia to look now. His child might never get to meet their sire.

But he’s also selfishly happy. He still has a part of Victor with him. Without a way to contact him or even find out if he’s okay, this baby will be his only connection to Victor.

Yuuri places his shaking hands over his stomach. He can’t articulate what he’s feeling to Phichit, especially as he can’t even name it himself. But maybe there’s a way he can help him understand.

“I don’t know how to say what I feel…but I _do_ know I want to keep this baby. It’s just—with everything—I want—it’s _Victor’s_.”

That was far less coherent than what he imagined, but it’s fine because Phichit understands anyway.

“Of course, Yuuri,” he says earnestly. “I’ll help you however I can.”

Phichit clutches him close in a tight hug. Usually Yuuri prefers to avoid physical contact when he can. He tries to take some comfort from the gesture, but there’s only one person Yuuri wants an embrace from right now.

And he’s the last person Yuuri is likely to get one from.

**Author's Note:**

> For the next update to this series, would you rather the next chapter of this, "Adia," which would probably be a slightly quicker update? Or Yuuri's before/after POV, "Zengo," which will probably take me longer to write? Let me know in the comments! As always, thank you!


End file.
